by Jeb

Post image for Fragility

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Goodbyes and new beginnings (manifesto sold separately) — How To Matter
11/05/2009 at 6:41 am

{ 6 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Kristin T. (@kt_writes) 06/04/2009 at 8:49 am

I assume by saying “live accordingly” that you don’t mean we should pack ourselves in bubble wrap and not do anything that might be jarring, right? Sometimes really living in the moment means being somewhat reckless, after all (but I know I don’t have to tell you that). :)

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2 Jeb 06/05/2009 at 10:29 am

That’s funny, KT. Actually, I hadn’t even considered that interpretation until you brought it up. Yet another example of how easy it is to miscommunicate, especially in written form.

No, this picture (and the resulting image it has become) inspired quite the opposite in me. Safety is overplayed, and boring, and it leads to regret. I’ve had quite enough of that to date. When my card is punched, when someone is taking a picture of me as my essence drifts about before dissipating entirely, I don’t want anyone to be thinking to themselves ‘now there’s a guy who played it safe’.


3 Josh 06/04/2009 at 10:42 pm

Hey! I like this. Did you make this?

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4 Jeb 06/05/2009 at 10:38 am

Hi Josh,
Yep, it was a picture I took while on a run the other day. These two helpless baby birds, dead as dirt in the middle of a concrete path. Never having the chance to fly, not even once. I don’t know what circumstances brought about their demise, but I couldn’t stop thinking about regret after happening upon them. About how so many of us (read: me) have held back, never daring to tap our inherent nature, our true potential, and let it flow like the mightiest of rivers.

I don’t know why that is, why I resist it…fear, I suppose (what if the river’s not all that mighty, after all?). But all of a sudden, it feels wrong to hold back. To squander what I’ve been given.


5 Dave Thurston 06/21/2009 at 8:04 pm

Hey Jeb - These damn 40s (30s I was still immortal, 50s I probably won’t give a darn) - but the 40s cause me to think - a lot - about not just making decisions or choices because they have to be made . . . but making those decisions and choices out of a larger - where do I really want to be right before my final resting place - even if it is tomorrow. I hate to have to write it this way, but living with intentional choices that match a much, much larger set of goals.

Swimming with the kids, playing cards, taking time to listen to my daughter’s day (in minute by minute detail) — all good and important. And all near that master plan path - but somehow indescribably just a little off the path. These three items above are choices - ah but they are not really active choices.

That is the difference - living for Active Choices - not just saying yes or no. But instead saying, “Here is My Plan . . . and now I’m implementing it.”

Ohh, I like that, I’m going to have to steal that for my journal.


6 Jeb 06/22/2009 at 10:34 am

Yes Dave, living for active choices. So many decisions are made passively, as a result simply of the momentum of life. Since “A” already occurred, well, “B” must naturally follow, right? I guess that’s part of the life-lessons we all endure. We learn along the way that we didn’t need to follow that progression, just because it seemed to fit or because society said we had to.

This awareness is often painful (or so it’s been for me), but so critical. I’m thankful I’m coming to it, despite the pain. Thanks for your thoughts Dave.


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