by Jeb

I thought I’d share a  bit more personal offering today.  As I’ve mentioned before, HowToMatter is nowhere near a “I know everything about living right and I’ve decided to share it with you’. Hardly. Nope, HTM is, for me, about the practice of becoming better. By considering my feelings on the topics that are important to me, and then writing about them and interacting with a handful of treasures who drop by from time to time, my hope is that I’ll emerge a better father. A better husband. A better citizen. A better me.

I’ve recently written down a few things that serve to keep me focused on that effort, to keep me from straying too far, as it were. Ideals, I suppose you’d call them - for me, for the life I’m living and the person I’m becoming. They’re a bit personal, but perhaps someone will gain something from them. Or (more likely) perhaps I’ll gain something from the engagement that I hope will follow. Regardless, here you have it.

Me, My Life

I have extremely high self-esteem and this allows me to pursue my dreams, and achieve my goals.

I am a thoughtful and loving husband and I successfully show this to Tess every single day.

I am an involved father and I regularly engage my boys in the activities they enjoy, and which bolster their self-confidence and fuel their passion for life.

I am a great friend and people seek me out as a result.

I have the confidence and freedom to live a purposeful life, to know what I want and to go after it. In this way, I am an excellent role model for my boys and I’m teaching them the value in being exactly who they are, engaged in the things that challenge them to be and do better each day.

I help others find joy and contentment as often as possible, and I participate daily in the lives of others. 

I value effort, and production, and though I enjoy the conveniences of our society, I never forget the importance of removing myself, and my family, from them frequently, of getting out into nature and experiencing the world in it’s raw form.

My Vision

I do not worry about the future or regret the past. Instead, I approach life with quiet confidence and know that I am exactly who, and where, I should be. I approach challenges with certainty that the solutions will come and that I’ll become a better person having endured, and overcome, them.

Professionally, I am extremely diversified and enjoy financial abundance, which allows me to pursue my dreams, my passions, and to expose my children to so much. We have come to value experiences together above all else, and we enjoy a collective understanding that the journey we’re on has no end…that as we travel this path, we are content in each moment and ever-grateful for the love we share, the life we’re building, and the opportunities we have to truly know ourselves, and to allow our inner selves to flourish.

We live in Colorado and are extremely content to be here. We have many close friends and we’ve all found a certain satisfaction that comes from seeing the impact we’re having on others, as well as the impact others have on us. We enjoy the connections, and we understand the importance of living in concert with our community, our planet.

I run avidly and enjoy competing in races on a monthly basis. Tess has found a perfectly fitting activity for her body and she is in excellent health. The boys, too, have found some sports and activities they love and are committed to. It is a great source of confidence, and belonging, for them and they are flourishing. Together, we travel regularly and enjoy seeing the many corners of the earth, near and far. Always there is an emphasis on connecting with the place from a deeper level than simply consuming the surface.

This is who we are. This is our life together.

Related posts:

  1. Making an effort.

{ 8 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Ryan 01/27/2009 at 9:04 pm

Reading through your list, I almost started to think you were that person-I suppose that is the point for you-and it made me all jealous. It made me wonder how I would feel if I achieved all of that (as tailored to my dreams)? I suppose it would be amazing… I just don’t know where I would go from there.

Truly inspiring though. I appreciate you getting a little more personal.


2 Jeb 01/27/2009 at 9:09 pm

Hey Ryan,
First, that was amazing. Out of the blue, after posting this, I thought…’I haven’t read Ryan’s blog in a while’. And I realized I didn’t have an RSS feed set up. So I went to your site, read the posts I’d missed and looked for a feed. When I couldn’t find it, I tweeted you…10 seconds later I get an email that you commented. I love it.

The thing of it is…I am that person. I just don’t always behave accordingly. I’m guessing you can relate to that emotion…no? Thanks for the comment Ryan.


3 Ryan 01/27/2009 at 9:20 pm

That was a strange coincidence!

I can totally relate to that feeling.Falling short of my expectations and who I think I am is the bane of my existence. It’s depressing. There is nothing worse than letting myself down. Letting others down gives me a temporary sadness, but letting myself down is worse. (Although I find that when I let myself down, I usually try to blame it on someone else, telling myself I only let them down, not me….)


4 Jeb 01/28/2009 at 4:12 pm

Yes, it’s a tough balancing act for me as well…having appropriate expectations that push me toward greater successes, but not getting too discouraged when the expectation isn’t met. If we can recognize that every goal we set wont be achieved, but that it has nonetheless brought us further down the path than we would have come had we not set it to begin with, I think it will help quiet that inner critic.

Thank you Ryan.


5 Richard Reeve 01/28/2009 at 9:39 am

Trusting that we are in the right spot, that the day will present us with the appropriate challenges and opportunities, that flow with the rhythm of exchange might lead to some unexpected efficacy to benefit ourselves and others…all this is a posture not unlike Yoda was teaching to the young Skywalker. Being connected to the story that bigger than myself, conscious of it, and contributing, this makes it worthwhile for me as well. Thanks for sharing your philosophy of life Jeb.


6 Jeb 01/28/2009 at 4:27 pm

Hey Richard, yes, for me, forgoing some control and trusting the universe to deliver precisely what I need and want, is critical. It’s a difficult mindset to adopt, and one that I certainly struggle with, but always seem to find my way back to.

I think it just takes time to learn that we can’t always, simply by our own might, steer the ship. Over time, as we grow and change and experience more of the world and our place in it, we discover that the current will naturally lead us to the many wonderful things that await us.

As they say, the universe is friendly to our plans. Put another way, “…your Father knows exactly what you need even before you ask Him”.


7 Henie 01/30/2009 at 5:56 pm


Just want to say that I enjoyed my visit here! Thank you so much!

And, thanks also for following me on Twitter! See you around!

Best Always,

Get Henie’s content here..Friday Focus


8 Jeb 01/31/2009 at 4:27 am

Thank you Henie, for dropping by and leaving this note. I look forward to more engagement around the web. Cheers.


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